For a long time, I didn’t know that I needed to improve my confidence and self-esteem because I had so much success in my life. There were however, times when I realized that I wanted to go after some BIG goal, then end up talking myself out of it.
It was just the way life was. “It is what it is” was a limitation that I accepted as a mantra. I made up excuses in my mind to justify it. Even if it hurt me in the long run, it felt comfortable, and there was solace in that.
I assumed it had something to do with the timing, or even that it just simply “wasn’t meant to be”. Something funny happened, though; I suddenly came to the realization one day that I wasn’t asking for more out of life. I had gotten too comfortable with settling for “okay”.
It was a new awareness that I suddenly had. “Good enough”… was not good enough anymore.
Beyond just limiting beliefs, I suffered from a poor self esteem. I struggled with having the confidence to build new relationships with movers and shakers. It was difficult talking confidently to anyone I respected or saw as “better” than me from their achievements.
This really hindered leveling-up my business, and I didn’t even see it before my epiphany. A huge portion of the reason I was staying stagnant in my business came from my not being confident enough in myself. I simply didn’t believe in my ability and felt like they were better than me. I felt insignificant.
Settling for less than ideal relationships was something that I became a way of life. It’s strange waking up one day and wanting more out of life but that’s what happened to me. I’m not sure if it was maturity or if I got sick and tired of my needs not being met. The thing is, I was afraid to ask for more. It took me years to get the courage to do that.
I spent years working on learning how to improve my confidence and self-esteem. It all stemmed from realizing that I deserved more. I AM enough.
There was more to it than that. I realized that I was afraid to push myself and go after what I wanted. It’s one thing to know that you’re enough but it’s quite another thing to have the courage to “go for it”.
As you go through your own life with it’s ups and downs, you’ll benefit from knowing that you can reach within yourself and find confidence the same way that I did. Even if you are already experiencing aspects of your life where you are in control and feeling a level of confidence. Accessing your confidence helps you avoid feeling down or disheartened, no matter what happens.
I’ve put together a few strategies that I think will help you improve your confidence and self-esteem.
- Start by analyzing the 3 toughest things you’ve ever done in your life. Take note that you were victorious as you came out of that crisis. When you examine these difficult situations, you can see what worked and what didn’t. Now that’s knowledge you can use. Whenever you’re not feeling that inner strength to go after something that you want, reflect on those tough times and the strategies that worked for you to get through them.
- What are your most significant achievements? Learn to celebrate the “wins” in your life. You need to be your own cheerleader every-single-day and this means that you need to have certain practices in place to build yourself up. Make it a habit of recognizing the milestones that you have achieved.
- Learn to talk to yourself in positive, encouraging ways. This will help you build up your inner strength.
- Embrace your strength. Remember that your strength has pulled you through many crises in the past. Have confidence that it can continue to bolster you through many more.
- Find a role model. When you see someone is doing the very thing that you fear doing, it gives you the confidence to move forward. You can easily say to your self, “if they can do it, so can I”.
Even when you’re experiencing a challenge and aren’t feeling too sure about yourself, try “faking it till you make it.” Use your knowledge about how confidence appears and behave that way. Soon after, you’ll begin to recognize and connect with your own true confidence.
This was admittedly difficult for me. All reason goes right out the window when fear kicks in. Then the negative internal talk begins to fill your thoughts and it’s all over. Having visual reminders is helpful too so keep some stickies around you to help affirm what you need but saying it out loud adds a certain magic so don’t discount that technique.
Although you might not always feel self-assured, try some of these strategies to find your confidence when you need it. Before you know it, you’ll have tapped into your self-confidence, and others will be emulating you!
Success is yours if you can improve your confidence and self esteem. You need to work on your mindset and inner strength to go after your BIG goals in life too. When you improve your confidence and self-esteem, it will dramatically change your life.
Don’t let fear drive your decisions, instead build the courage on your own personal development journey to create more happiness and abundance in your life as if your life depended on it… Because it does.