Give yourself a break already…Learn some new strategies to let go of the past.
It is a fact that the person who we find most difficult to forgive is ourselves. Guilt, shame, and regret hinder us from letting go and moving on from our mistakes. Instead of reflecting and subsequently learning from our past so we can be able to move on, we have this tendency to dwell on these unfortunate events.
Fact: We Remain Trapped In The Past When We Refuse To Forgive Ourselves.
Now, the good news is that simple strategies exist to help you come to terms with yourself so you can forgive yourself from regret, learn from your mistakes and move forward towards a fulfilling life.
Strategies to let go of the past
Give these great strategies a try to help you forgive yourself so you can move on:
- Hold yourself accountable for your mistake and be honest about it.
For many, we try to justify and defend ourselves. Instead of simply justifying your actions, reflect on that mistake. Identify your part in the mistake and own up to it completely. I would say that this is a pretty difficult task. Some of us are better at this than others.
Remember: Simply being honest with yourself and stating what you might have done wrong is the first step towards letting go of the shame, guilt and pain that you feel.
Examine the events and circumstances leading to your crucial mistake and be honest about how you feel about it then and how you are feeling now. This is how we learn.
Also, consider how this course of events has impacted other people physically and emotionally. It’s a good step when you can put other’s feelings above yours in situations like these. Otherwise, we can get stuck in the blame-game.
It is best to talk about this with a religious adviser, life coach, counselor, close friend or relative that you trust. Seek their guidance and opinion about the gravity of your mistake because chances are, they will see your slip up in a more forgiving light than you do, and make you realize that your mistake does not mean the end of another chance to move on.
- Always be ready to offer a remedy and make amendments.
Take into consideration the things that you could have done differently to prevent your slip up, and formulate a plan to act in a different manner should you face a similar situation in the future. This simple act can actually help you to forgive yourself.
Even if it has taken some time since the slip up has occurred, and its consequences led to the harm of other people, make sure to ask for an apology and gain their forgiveness. This simple action alone is therapeutic enough for you and the person or persons involved as a result of your blunder.
If making amends with the person or persons involved in the blunder is not possible, you should definitely consider doing good deeds and acts of genuine kindness to show yourself and other people that you truly regret your own actions.
If your slip up has caused you financial loss, plan and executed restitution: Share the experience with other people so that they may be able to avoid being put in the same situation.
- Realize that the experience has made you a different person from the one who originally made the mistake.
Always find ways to help other people out and stay away from circumstances that can lead to a similar lapse in the coming times.
We all make mistakes, and there are times when they come with grave consequences. But regardless of the gravity and seriousness of our mistakes, we all deserve forgiveness. So we must take the opportunity to repent and make amends so that we can be able to let fully go and move on.
I hope these strategies to let go of the past have helped. If you found this article helpful and if if resonated with you, share it and please leave a comment below to give me your thoughts.