Wedding Self-care: Managing Stress from “Yes” to “I do”

wedding self care, less stressful weddings

It’s a fact well known that the time between saying ‘Yes’ to saying “I Do” can be stressful for those who are about to get hitched. When it comes to celebrating your special day, it’s only natural to want everything to be perfect and this desire can create thoughts which in turn create stress, anxiety and overwhelm.

If you’re a high achieving, and high performing individual in all other spheres of your life, letting go of stress when preparing for your wedding can be tough. However, stress management is an art. Just like everything else in your life, it’s something that you learn over time through rigorous and conscious practice.  

So, if you’re looking for ways to manage your stress through self care activities before the big day, here are some tips that will help you relax and enjoy the preparations more: 

Take Care Of The Urgent Tasks First 

First things first, as a rule, remember that you should ask yourself if you can change the situation by taking a specific action and if not, change your thoughts about it. As far as managing the whole show of your wedding, the best way to manage stress is by handling things that are causing you stress.

Control the controllables.

The most important things that you need to take care of as a bride or bridegroom, include your choice of wedding attire, and your selection of venue. It’s important to understand that if your wedding is going to be held months from now, it’s natural to lose or gain weight, so having room in your outfit for last minute alterations is a smart choice to make. Don’t stress about fitting into a dress, think about how the attire makes you feel. If you feel happy and confident wearing the dress, it’s the one for you.  

And when it comes to the choice of venue, you must book a venue of your choice months before the wedding to ensure that you get your dream venue on the day of your wedding. Whether you’re looking forward to getting married in a beautiful ranch in San Juan Capistrano, or your eyes are set on a terrific beach club in Orange County, making a decision early can help you align all the other arrangements of your wedding more easily and save you a lot of stress free nights later on. 

So Stressed You're Not Excited

One of my clients is a wedding planner, and she intimated to me "I've seen it all". From brides turning into bridezillas to grooms getting cold feet at the last minute, the stress of planning a wedding can truly bring out the worst in people. It's supposed to be the happiest day of their lives, but instead, they end up creating unnecessary problems for themselves.

My client recounts a story of one particular couple who were so excited about their upcoming wedding that they couldn't seem to stop stressing out about every little detail. From the color of the napkins to the seating arrangements, they obsessed over every aspect of the big day. And as a result, they were constantly bickering with each other and their families, causing tension and drama where there should have been joy and love.

It wasn't until I suggested she sit them down and reminded them of the real reason they were getting married that they finally started to relax. She told them that the most important thing was that they were marrying their best friend for the rest of their lives, and that everything else was just icing on the cake. Once they realized that, they were able to let go of their need for perfection and just enjoy the process instead of having a stressful wedding day.

In the end, their wedding was beautiful and filled with love, just as it should have been. And now they can look back on the day with fond memories, instead of regretting all the stress and drama they had put themselves through. 

But what other ways can you take care of yourself in the process?

Get Enough Rest 

You'd be surprised at how being stressed out can cause sleep issues. The easiest way to calm those nerves is by sleeping well. An adult requires 7 to 8 hours of deep sleep to feel refreshed, energized, and stress free. While the preparations for your ceremony can take your entire day, reserve your nights for yourself. Women, on an average, require more sleep than men, and are likely to suffer from insomnia, due to stress and anxiety. After all, if you’re continuously wondering about your wedding venue, and whether it should be a piece of medieval architecture, or should be a hotel with a contemporary style, sleep can be hard to come by. 

stressful wedding day

If you’re having trouble getting in some much needed hours of sleep, follow a simple sleep routine. Create a calm and noise free environment for yourself by either using ear plugs, or a white noise machine, close all the blinds and curtains to ensure a pitch dark environment, and avoid consuming substances that may interfere with your sleep patterns. These can include alcohol, caffeine, and nicotine. Taking a stroll after dinner can also help you feel better by aiding digestion and inducing sleep. 

Follow A Skin Care Routine 

When talking about self care, skin care has to be on the top of the list. Having a dedicated skin care routine serves two purposes. First, it helps your skin prepare for all the makeup that it’s going to be under following the days to your wedding. Second, it will act as a ritual, something that you do everyday or night as you wind down, let the stress of the day melt away, and relax. 

While it may be tempting to try new things for that extra glow and finish before the wedding, it’s better to skip the hassle of finding new things and experimenting on your face so close to your wedding. Just follow your regular skin care regime, one that has benefitted your skin over the years. And if you don’t have one, following a simple cleanser, toner, moisturizer routine should be good. The idea isn’t to compete with an esthetician, but rather enjoy the self care process. 

Use Stress Reducing Techniques 


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A lot of your pre-wedding jitters have to do with stress and anxiety that’s stored in your body. To release the energy that’s causing you stress, and help you feel more aligned with your short and long term goals, invest some time in learning about stress reduction techniques. 

If you want a quick solution, following a meditation or yoga routine for a few months building up to your big day will make a noticeable difference. Even engaging in any of your favorite hobbies that encourage you to move your body can be helpful. You could take up dancing, running, progressive muscle relaxation, or find ways to calm your mind with music, and gardening.  

However, if you want a healthy, and a more sustainable option to manage your stress and anxiety, then making use of stress management coaching is the right move for you. 

Try Out A Workout Plan That Works For You 

Everyone’s body is different and that’s what makes us unique. It also gives us an opportunity to find a workout that works the best for our short and long term needs. If you want to truly indulge in self care and lower your stress levels, then exercising is the way to go about it. In fact, according to a study by Harvard Health, regular aerobic exercise has a lot of proven psychological benefits, many of which promote calmness and dissipate stress. 

By working with a personal trainer or even hitting the gym to lift some weights before your wedding can help you get rid of all that extra stress and use that anxious energy into something positive and relaxing.  

Eat Healthy, Eat Regularly 

Yes, regular hydration is the key if you want to look dazzling on your wedding day, but so is the type of diet that you’re consuming. Our body is a temple, and whatever we put in it has an impact on our skin, organs, hormones, and ultimately our energy levels. If you’re feeling too anxious and stressed, try checking your diet. After all, your diet makes up a substantial portion of your self care. 

Are you forgetting to have proper meals because you have so much to juggle between your job, home, and the upcoming wedding? Meal Planning, keeping healthy snack options, and buying organic fruits and vegetables will help you keep energized throughout the day. Regular eating will also keep your blood sugar levels in check, and you’ll feel less stressed.  

Spend Some Quality Time With Yourself 

Yes, just take some time away from your wedding planning duties and use this time to do what you enjoy. Do you want to journal, take a short trip, cook for yourself, curl up in bed and read a book, walk your dog, take out some time for personal coaching, or simply go for a jog while listening to your favorite music? 

Whatever it may be, taking some for yourself can help you find ways to manage your stress and anxiety related to the wedding in a healthier way. Finding ways to manage and express your stress can help you feel lighter. If you’re concerned about something, figure out what’s bothering you and try talking to your partner about it. 

Final Thoughts 

Remember, the idea is not to tire yourself out stressing about little things but rather have fun doing things that make you happy. Wedding is a beautiful destination, but so is the journey that precedes the special day. Take some time from the planning and preparation of the day and focus on yourself. 

So to all the couples out there who are planning their weddings, remember to take a step back and focus on what truly matters. Because in the end, it's not about the napkins or the seating arrangements - it's about the love you share with each other.

Take yourself out, do things that make you happy, and take the pressure off of yourself. This isn’t the time to get frustrated and angry about things being a certain way, it’s about enjoying the process that leads to a life that you’re going to spend with your partner. 

Author Bio

Founder of Fearless Pursuits, LLC, the life coach blog, and The Daily Shift. I empower individuals to overcome challenges, nurture empowering habits, and elevate their confidence. As a WHOLEistic online life coach, I specialize in creating mindset shifts, for sustainable change. As your guide, you'll embark on a transformative journey to unlock your full potential, destress, and achieve the success you deserve. Get ready to experience life-changing coaching that leads to remarkable results.