Want to rekindle love in your relationship? You may be feeling like the fire in your relationship has died, or like it lacks the same passion it once had when you first met. In this article, I’ll discuss some of the ways you can improve your marriage through building better habits and practices.
We’re all told the limiting belief that, once the “honeymoon phase” wears off in a relationship, turmoil is inevitable. However, contrary to what you may have been told, struggle doesn’t have to define the entire future of your relationship.
Suggested reading: 5 Ways to Build Meaningful Relationships – and Keep Them
After the so-called honeymoon phase wears off, things tend to be routine among the both of you. But you don’t have to leave it that way. With the commitment of dedicating time every day to renew the enthusiasm, it’s easy to bring it back to life.
Here is a checklist of healthy habits to rekindle love in your relationship:
1. You may already sleep in the same bed, but do you go to bed at the same time?
If you make it a practice to climb into bed at the same time, this time can be used to reconnect your hearts before you sleep.
By now, the kids are already tucked in. A couple of minutes of snuggling every night can enhance your relationship through intimate love and connection, instead of staying up until late at night watching TV or obsessing over work while your better half is already falling asleep.
Making an effort to be on a similar schedule as your lover for the sake of connecting is a wonderful way to make them feel important.
2. Plan time to reminisce more often.
Remembering what brought you together in the first place is easier when you think back to the day you met, or your first date.
Was there a particular place you can visit again together? If not, was there a meal you both ordered on your first date that you can get again for old times’ sake? Did you two meet for a cheesy old flick that you can rent to cuddle up on the couch and watch again together?
3. Make your partner feel significant and appreciated.
Beyond showing your partner that they matter to the world as an individual, you need to show them how much they matter to you personally.
Everyone you will ever meet wants to know that they are appreciated, needed, and wanted. You have probably felt this way before, too. Finding a balance between all three of these things is important because…
- Showing appreciation shows them that what they do and who they are makes a difference. Everyone wants to believe that they’re helpful.
- Showing that you need someone makes them feel like they are an important part of your life and your personal happiness.
- Showing that you want someone makes them feel loved and adored.
Have a keen awareness for the things they do to help you or make you feel loved, and tell them that you recognize and appreciate it. This not only makes them feel good about themselves, but it also encourages them to keep it up!
4. Surprise your lover once in a while.
Spontaneity works magic to bring variety to a relationship and rekindle love. But first, do you know what specific language in which they perceive love?
Is it through physical connection, or through small gifts like flowers? Could it be as simple as texts throughout the day to show that you were thinking of them?
If you know how they see love, it will be easy for you to do something out of the blue that will make them feel fulfilled again.
Don’t be afraid to ask them how they see love. Ask them if the things that you do for them already make them feel loved. On its own, that communication is a huge way to show how much you care about their happiness.
An honest answer that will forever impact the way you love is so much better than wasting your time, energy, or money on things that may not mean as much to them as you hope.
5. Make time for physical connection every day.
It’s important to connect with each other through touch more ways than just intimacy. It can be anything from a massage, to snuggling on the couch with a movie over the weekend.
Be conscious to connect even in the little ways, like a hug, a kiss, or a sudden smack on the buns – yes, I said it!
There was probably nothing stopping you from doing that when you were younger… why stop now? Part of keeping the love alive is showing them that you’re willing to be bold enough to show it – no matter how silly.
6. “Check in” with each other’s emotional satisfaction from time to time.
Again, communication with your lover is important, and this is one of the best ways to start improving it.
Ask them how they are feeling about the state of the relationship, and what you could do to improve the way that you show love. Share with them what they could do to make you feel more satisfied, too. Ask them if there is anything that you do that makes them perceive a lack of love or significance.
Checking in with each other regularly is a wonderful way to learn the areas where each person needs to improve, and most importantly, you have the opportunity to iron out problems before someone reaches their boiling point.
Commit to investing the time and energy it takes to rekindle love in your relationship like it deserves. For many years to come, you’ll both be happy you did!
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Feel free to drop a comment or a question below, and I will be happy to respond as soon as I can!